Essay writing(cont)

Post chung với YenNhi bên kia hơi khó nhìn.Ngân post lại bên đây nhá Hiệp.Hihi

_Next week ,I will start to do a part-time job. I was wavering between two options that which job would be suitable for me .Should I work as private tutor or checker in a super-market?. I’m a second year student in the university now and I live far from my family .The reasons for me to find a part- time job are to earn payment and gain experiment as well .I’m very independent and I want to earn money to support myself instead of receiving money from my parent every month .But what made me still hesitate is managing
my time .In the second year in university ,I have to work hard on my study and participate many activities in my class .So if I do a part-time job ,It will take up me another time. So time is an important connsideration in this case .I have to consider advantages and disadvantages of both jobs which I gonna take before I make up my mind.

_At first glance, they both take me the same amount of time for each and also the time for transportation is not too much. And another thing is payment for both of them is also the same. It seems that they have common advantages at first.

_It was when I look the differences between the two jobs that made me come to the final decision. Working as private tutor and working as checker are different in every way .They’re two completely different types of job that I should pay a lot attention to. One is brainy work and another is mindless work. Compare with being a private tutor ,being checker in a super-market is very much easier .As a checker ,my work simply is checking the bills on customer’s goods with technical assistance whereas work as tutor requires me a lot of things such as spending time to search material and do some preparations for lessons .In addition , I have to assume responsibility giving my students a good preparation for their exam because these students are in the last year in junior high school and their parents have great of expectation for their graduation’s results. I started to realize the disadvantages of tutor job are beside the time I spend in class with my students ,I have to spend another time for preparation and with high requirements from parents’ students ,it seems pressure plus pressure ;I would be under pressure of my study and teaching.Maybe I can’t manage both at the same time .On the other hand, there is hardly any disadvantages on being checker in supermarket .If I work in supermarket , I will have time to relax ;leave out pressure from my study and have chance to interact with people around ;improve communication skill and building relationship as well .This is easily the most suitable part-time job for me.

_In conclusion ,after taking advantages and disadvantages of both into consideration I think I made the right choice .Since time and relaxation are all very important to me .I will probably be free from care and
happier when I work as checker.

I try writing on comparison-contrast type.hope Hiệp,miss Birdy and all of friends here correct things for me!

What is the essay topic? Ngân

Nhưng Ngân viết theo thể loại này không phải là dành cho thi IELTS, có thể chỉ là kiểu văn tự sự thôi thì phải!

Ngân đâu có viết để thi IElTS đâu Hiệp.Ngân tập viết theo kiểu
comparison-contrast trong sách thôi mà.

Hi there NguyetNgan!

I hope this helps!

Next week ,I will start to do a part-time job. I was wavering between two options that which job would be suitable for me .Should I work as private tutor or checker in a super-market?. I’m a second year student in the university now and I live far from my family .The reasons for me to find a part- time job are to earn payment and gain experiment as well .I’m very independent and I want to earn money to support myself instead of receiving money from my parent every month .But what made me still hesitate is managing
my time .In the second year in university ,I have to work hard on my study and participate many activities in my class .So if I do a part-time job ,It will take up me another time. So time is an important connsideration in this case .I have to consider advantages and disadvantages of both jobs which I gonna take before I make up my mind.

I am contemplating of doing a part-time job next week. I have two options to consider: work as a private tutor or a checker in a supermarket. Right now, I am in a quandary which job to take.

At present, I am a second year student in the University and living far from home. I need to work on a part-time job to earn for my extra allowance and to gain experience, as well. As I am very independent, I feel like earning money to support myself rather than depend on my parents for monthly support. But what falters me in deciding on this matter is the issue on how to manage my time. Being a university student, I need time to study and participate in many school activities. Thus, if I take a part-time job, I need to budget my time. Time is of the essence in this case, so I need to consider the ‘pros and cons’ before I decide to make up my mind.

_At first glance, they both take me the same amount of time for each and also the time for transportation is not too much. And another thing is payment for both of them is also the same. It seems that they have common advantages at first.

_It was when I look the differences between the two jobs that made me come to the final decision. Working as private tutor and working as checker are different in every way .They’re two completely different types of job that I should pay a lot attention to. One is brainy work and another is mindless work. (Please don’t say this, you might offend some checkers out there…hehe…all jobs need the mind to work…hehe) Compare with being a private tutor ,being checker in a super-market is very much easier .As a checker ,my work simply is checking the bills on customer’s goods with technical assistance whereas work as tutor requires me a lot of things such as spending time to search material and do some preparations for lessons .In addition , I have to assume responsibility giving my students a good preparation for their exam because these students are in the last year in junior high school and their parents have great of expectation for their graduation’s results. I started to realize the disadvantages of tutor job are beside the time I spend in class with my students ,I have to spend another time for preparation and with high requirements from parents’ students ,it seems pressure plus pressure ;I would be under pressure of my study and teaching.Maybe I can’t manage both at the same time .On the other hand, there is hardly any disadvantages on being checker in supermarket .If I work in supermarket , I will have time to relax ;leave out pressure from my study and have chance to interact with people around ;improve communication skill and building relationship as well .This is easily the most suitable part-time job for me.

At the first glance, both jobs demand the same amount of time and involve the same pay. A slight difference in travel time to the work place does not matter though. However, looking more intently on the type of work each job requires makes the difference. Working as a private tutor and working as a checker are different in every way . (They’re) They are two completely different types of job that I should pay (a lot) more attention to.

Comparing both jobs, being a private tutor can be a little tougher than working as a checker. A checker simply follows a daily routine like checking the bills on customer’s goods, giving some technical assistance and doing some other simple errands at the store while a tutor requires doing a lot of things such as spend time searching and researching materials for the tutorial and do some preparations for the daily lessons. Moreover, a tutor is faced with a greater responsibility than a checker. And in this case, as a tutor of some graduating students in a junior high school, I need to exert more effort to assist them in their final exam being pressed with so many expectations from their paying parents. Thinking this over and over again, I realized I would be putting pressure to my studies. This, I think, is bit difficult to manage. But on the other hand, if I work as a checker, it will be more relaxing on my part. There can be less pressure in my studies and I can develop confidence through interacting with people, improve my communication skills and increase friends, too. Now, I believe that this can be a suitable part-time job for me.

_In conclusion ,after taking advantages and disadvantages of both into consideration I think I made the right choice .Since time and relaxation are all very important to me .I will probably be free from care and
happier when I work as checker.

Well, I think I have analyzed all the advantages and disadvantages of these two jobs. And now, I have made the right choice. Time is too precious for me as a student and being free from pressure is very important, as well. I am now certain that I will be happy to work as a part-time checker in the Supermarket than being a private tutor.

Suggestions: I think it is best to avoid making contractions in writing, if possible. An informal type of contraction occurs frequently in speech and writing, in which a syllable is substituted by an apostrophe and/or other mode of elision, e.g., can't for "cannot", won't for "will not". Such contractions are often either negations with not or combinations of pronouns with auxiliary verbs, e.g., I'll for "I will". Academic writing does require formal writing.

Hi Miss Birdy ! Long time no see.I'm glad to receive your corrections and comments for me again! I know to rewrite all this took you a lot of time and.... you have just recovered from bad migraine ...maybe I minded you with stuffs I wrote .hihi.Thank you so much ,Miss Birdy.Wish you good health.Miss!

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